Possibly the Most Stupid Thing Ever Said in the History of Human Speech

Person 1: Hi! I'm here to conduct a surprise pricing audit of your store.

Person 2: Why didn't you call to let me know you were coming?

Because Fridays are for procrastination

Pineapple: glucose-spiking nature treat or trusted, faithful companion. You decide

http://www.usanetwork.com/series/psych/games/pineapplepal/

Sign of Immaturity AND Old Age

I just got the weekly list of upcoming concerts from Ticketmaster, and the only performer whose name I recognized was Elmo.